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Written by Josh Millard
Year: 1996
Recordings:
Lyrics:
Jonnie asked me
If I wanted to stay in the car
She thought that I might be embarrassed
By her feminine protection products

I said
Jonnie
I have two older sisters
And a mother
I'm not afraid of
Pink-wrapped absorbant things

Oh my
O.B.
This is nothing new to me
Let's tramp on back
To the tampon rack
And see what we can see

We went in
And bee-lined for the menstrual aisle
And I pranced
And danced
And taught those pads to sing
In perfect harmony

Jonnie just laughed
And purchased her blood-collection pads
From the clerk behind the counter
Who'd never seen someone
Use a tampon as a microphone before

Tampon Song

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